13 Things A Woman Can Do To Love Herself

MRecently read this appalling article on Thought Catalog. Yes, John Smith, I'm talking to you. It was appalling, and controlling, and good fucking luck finding this perfect woman you so desire. I decided to rebuttal his brilliant masterpiece of oppression with a 13 Things that we can do to love ourselves. Like RuPaul once said: "If you don't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?" Gosh, this article was such a piece of shit. Read it here:
13 Things A Woman Can Do To Make Herself More Attractive to Men 

Seriously, that's the tittle. And as you read through it, you may think this is satire. You may even want to believe it is satire. But, it isn't. Someone actually believes this is true. Someone, somewhere, needs some guidance. So without further ado: 

13 Things A Woman Can Do To Love Herself

1. Stay Healthy 

Eat your fruits, eat your vegetables, let your heart rate rise for at least 20 minutes a day. Your body is so so so beautiful. Treat it like the magnificent vessel it is. Some days, it is important to eat a slice of cake, too. Reward your beauty with a bag of Doritos's, you deserve that too.

2. Dress Yourself In Confidence

When you look your best, you feel your best. If you like dark eye make-up, you're going to look better with it on. Your hair grows blonde, but you like it red, it's going to look better red. Confidence is so sexy. Your tattoos have meaning, so much meaning you made a lifelong commitment to them. Flaunt them. Your piercings are your edge, own them. Your style is so completely you, however you chose to wear it. It is perfect. 

3. Make Your Own Money

And share it with those in need. Treat yourself to a pair of Marc Jacobs. And please, please don't depend on marrying rich. You are not the number in your bank account. You are a 10, a dime, a masterpiece.(This is not a dis on stay at home mamas, you guys rock too! Y'all have a job most aren't willing to do. Your money may not come in the form of US dollars, but you get paid in memories and crayon drawings. A currency that is so sacred.)

4. Be Whoever You Want To Be

A daisy sundress today, your Chuck Taylor's tomorrow. I don't care. Who you love doesn't care. Who loves you doesn't care. Let your unique soul should shine through. It makes a difference. 

5. Do NOT Be Submissive

Stand your ground. When you believe something, believe it. When you love something, love it. And when something hurts you, let it hurt, and defend yourself. But please do compromise. Compromise with your friends, your family, and your lover.

6. Sex Life 

Your sex life is your own business. And you have every right to say "no" without explanation.
7. Be Intelligent

For yourself, not to impress anyone else. Learn what makes your brain happy. Feed it.

8. Be A Good Mother 

Or motherly figure. Mean something to someone, be a role model. It may be your son, your daughter, your siblings, your mother or father, or a friend. This includes bringing responsible people into your life. You are who you surround yourself with. And the people around you can benefit or suffer. Let them benefit.

9. Cook What Tastes Good

Feed yourself, Ms.Beautiful, don't neglect to eat. Some nights, it will be hot tea and pasta. Others it will be homemade Chinese cuisine. And some nights, you will spoil your lover, and yourself, with delicious food. This comes back to compromise. If someone is working late, the other makes dinner. This "be willing to cook at least three times a week" is a deranged standard. If it makes your lover happy, you should cook for them. For the simple and pure reason of wanting to make the one you love happy. Happiness is infectious like that. You make someone happy, and somehow it shines back into your life.

10. Put Down the Phone, Then Pick It Back Up 

Put down the phone to engage yourself with another. With a good book, or with a gripping documentary. Put down your phone to take a good look in the mirror and really love what is looking back at you. You don't need the likes on Instagram to prove your beauty to the world, you need your confidence. Let's be honest with ourselves though, those "likes", they do make you feel pretty damn good. And when you do pick your phone back up, call an old friend and tell them you miss them.

11. Wear Your Make-Up, Girl. 

And rock it! However you want, or don't want. This is your choice.

12. Cuss Like You Mean It 

Cuss when you're so mad, that "asshole" is the only term you can come up with. Or when you're so happy that you can't find any other descriptive words. Or just because you can. 

13. Have Quality Friends

Male or Female. Or Purple. If they are quality, they will make you better. If they encourage you on bad days, and celebrate with you on good days, you should keep them around for all of your days.

14. If You Read Trash, Write Something Else
The beauty of opinions is that everyone can have their own. I don't hate you, John Smith, but I do not agree with what you wrote. Hopefully this article finds people before yours does. Because a woman is a beautiful creature. And really, she can throw all my standards of loving herself out the door, too, if she wants too. The bottom line is: love who you are, and don't apologize for who you are. You are wonderful. You are brilliant. And you cannot be duplicated. That is what is beautiful.